Many a time, almost each of us encounter a scenario amidst our daily acts and deeds, wherein we fall into the trap of anger, hatred and grudge for someone close or distant, and for reasons, rational or irrational. Inspired by one such incident, a thought strikes my mind. Is it really worth?
Is it truly worth holding a grudge against someone when we know that there are many more important tasks yet waiting to be accomplished compared to this. But then, does that mean one must completely ignore the other person’s wrong doings? The answer from within says a big “NO”. Upon drilling further down the thought process, it becomes apparent that the root flaw is in our own logic of hatred and anger.
We all must ask ourselves that what do we hate, the act of wrong doing, or the doer himself. I’m sure it’s the act, but in the process of losing our temper we fail to clearly observe the act and the doer as separate and eventually develop a false or rather a negative notion for that person.
With that the next question that appears is that what is the solution then? It is forgiveness, whispers the heart. It is that divine and complete forgiveness that detaches us from the clutches of hatred, and such forgiveness is devoid of any kind of self-pride that could arise from this benevolent act.
There could be many voices coming up against this thought of forgiveness and with ‘N’ number of arguments to support. But then immediately, the below lines appear as thoughts.
Forgive, because you are a human and so is he
Forgive, because you are a soul and so is he
Forgive, because you are beautiful and so is he
Forgive because you are kind and compassionate
With a heart full of love that resonate
Forgive because forgiveness is a gift
To someone needful as well as you
Forgive because you realise that
“Hate the sin and not the sinner”
Forgive because nothing is permanent
Neither this life, nor one’s sins
Forgive because life is a circle
As you sow, so shall you reap
Forgive because life is short
And grudge has no end
Forgive because you are strong
And forgiveness is the attribute of the stronger
Forgive because forgiveness is bliss
A bliss that lightens up your soul
Forgive because forgiveness is a jewel possessed by the kings
And each one of us is a king of our life
Forgive because it relieves someone of their guilt
And helps pave their way towards a new persona to be built
Forgive because it relieves you of your ego and pride
And helps pave your own way for a smoother ride
Forgive now, for when you forgive
You bow down to help someone rise up
Forgive because even the supreme forgives us for our wrongs
And continue to love us and guide us through our life songs
Forgive because forgiveness is giving
And giving selflessly is beautiful…..
A quite informative and significant article on this concept of forgiveness elaborated in the above lines is worth sharing. A short intro on the same as presented by this guide’s editor Mel is as below. You may follow the link ahead for the complete article.
Forgiveness – A Complex But Important Process
Forgiveness, we are told, is a virtue. More than that, as a thousand oft-shared motivational social media posts tell us, it’s something which is as good for us as it is for those who have wronged us. While these platitudes and pseudo-psychological sentiments are ostensibly right, however, they frequently fail to take into account the immense complexity of the forgiveness process. You cannot simply say ‘I forgive you’ and immediately obliterate both the wrong done to you and the emotional fallout from it. True forgiveness is a far longer and more psychologically involved process than that. Hurt, resentment, and a desire for revenge may still linger if the forgiveness is not truly meant. Indeed, in the long run it is probably better not to say ‘I forgive you’ if you do not truly feel it. Instead say ‘I will try to forgive you’, and then start a process by which you and the one who has wronged you work together to acknowledge, accept, and move past the hurt.
Not Easy, And Not Trivial
It’s too easy to assume that ‘forgiveness’ means an elimination of the past, that it’s a way of skating over problems and pretending that bad things have never happened. For this very reason, some people choose not to forgive. In fact, true forgiveness comes from acknowledging what has happened, emotionally processing it, and choosing to resume a loving relationship with the perpetrator nonetheless. Properly accepting and working through issues in order to achieve true forgiveness can actually strengthen and deepen a relationship. Brushing such issues off with a trite and unfelt three-word statement, on the other hand, often leaves such issues unresolved and likely to rear their ugly heads once again. Forgiveness is not a trivial matter to be taken lightly. It is a very important aspect of personal and relationship growth, which should be treated with the weight and respect it deserves.
Do It Properly
Forgiving someone can be a very long process. Nor is it easy – it can be tough to sort through all the hard emotions which arise when you are wronged by someone you love. However, it is worth doing, and worth doing properly. Ultimately, both parties will get a lot out of proper, true forgiveness. Don’t expect it to happen fast, and don’t expect it to be simple, but do your best! For more on this, see this article.