Hi NRJ, I start to shiver and my body becomes shaky when I’m angry. What should I do? How can I work upon this?

Shaking your legs or feeling shakiness or an unsteadiness in the entire body is nothing but a psychological sign of anger. Different people express their anger in different ways. Some of the various signs of anger are:

  • Shakiness in the body
  • Tightly pressing your teeth
  • Feeling a heat from within the body
  • Face and eyes turning red
  • Shaking the legs
  • Heart beat rate increasing suddenly
  • Tensing of body muscles

All these are some of the many signs of anger. Different people exhibit different signs when they are angry. In your case shakiness in the body and legs is a sign of your anger. This shakiness is usually accompanied with a strong heat that can be felt within the body.

Once an individual realizes the exact signs which they exhibit when they are angry, all that is required is to consciously make an effort to control that anger and slowly finish it from the roots. Controlling anger can many times be taken in wrong sense. In an attempt to control anger, one might prevent the release of his anger, thus preventing its outburst. This situation is more harmful to one psychologically. It is because in this case, the person is simply avoiding the display of anger but is actually feeding it within his own self.

Thus when I say that after understanding the signs, you need to learn to control it, you actually need to learn to curb it to the extent that unfavourable situation would also not be able to persuade you to use this anger.

For this, meditation is the best medicine. As I have mentioned in some previous articles, meditation is a process wherein a person turns inward towards his/her own self. By focusing on a particular idea or a directing the entire thought process towards one particular virtue of human being your concentration will start diverting from the unnecessary outward activities to your inner self. With regular practice and guidance of a correct person you will learn to gain control over your emotions.

With this, you will realize that you have started turning more and more calm. You will actually notice it in your body language. The results will reflect in the way you think, in the way you deal with people. It will reflect in the overall outlook of life and the overall objective of living. You will realize that those issues that were ever a point of difference for you actually did not deserve that due importance which you gave them.

You got angry because you gave importance to some particular issues in life. With meditation, your entire thought process will get directed in the correct direction.

Thus meditation is the remedy for your anger and the shakiness that you go through when you are angry. Yoga is one form of meditation which you can resort to. Thus meditation is the long-term solution to this problem but also that it has to be deployed only under proper guidance to see the true results.

Along with meditation or yoga, the right thinking in the right direction will add to your progress. Whenever you get angry and have calmed down a bit after that phase passes away, spend some time alone. Think about that entire situation again and with a view to finding the truth, introspect! Do an analysis of your behaviour in that situation. Search for answers to the questions like: “What was the alternate solution rather than getting angry?”

With such analysis, make sure to control your anger the next time you fall in such a situation. In fact, for initial stages, until you start seeing the results of meditation and yoga, try and avoid falling into situations that make you angry. Look for alternatives which will not only serve your purpose but also prevent you from falling to your anger. Remember, putting some extra efforts in completing your daily tasks is much better than resorting to anger to avoid the task itself.

Also, emotions like love, compassion and humbleness are the ones which will help you stay calm and within your own self. Practicing them in your day-to-day task will ease up your task of finishing your anger from its roots.

The day you realize that anger is like that fire ball which before throwing on other, you yourself need to pick it up in your hands you will feel the urge from within that it is something worth giving up. Anger can never help others or even you. So start making a conscious effort right away. Be with people who can help you control your anger and guide you in the right direction. Do not be afraid to say sorry also whenever and wherever required.

You might fail initially, even a number of times. But what is needed is that belief that you can win over this anger. Things will change slowly. All the best!

Related posts:

How To Deal With Your Anger?

How should we deal with people who have a very short temper?

 

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6 comments
sivakumar.s says May 12, 2015

Sir when I get angry while speaking to a higher officer, my legs and my lips shiver, but I try to control myself so my times, but I am not able to control. I am very shamed to speak to others because my lips are shiver. What is the solution?

Reply
    asknrj says June 28, 2015

    In such a scenario, if you are losing your temper on your senior, then you have no option but to stay silent. Instead of reacting, stay silent. Do not speak a word or back answer as it would make things difficult for you in your company. Just listen to what your senior has to say and move away. Later, after you calm down, you may approach him back and politely discuss your part with him.

    With time, learn to accept few things the way they are. Here, you need to analyze your situation. If you know that things can’t change, then learn to accept them the way they are. If something related to your own task is not correct, then discuss. No one would stop you from doing that. But in a polite manner. You need to learn that in a corporate environment because you would have to face many obstacles in your task. Stay humble. Stay Polite.

    All the best and apologies for the late reply 🙂

    Reply
Agustin says August 20, 2015

Sir when I get mad a start to feel heat from within my body and then my body begins to shake, my hands and upper body shake the most, I also feel slightly weak. This recently started to happen, before when I got mad I would hit things and hit other people if it got to that, I went to go see someone about my anger issues and was told to relax and stay calm and let it go away, but after letting it go away so many times, now every time I get mad I shake a lot and feel weak. Is there any cure to this?!

Reply
    asknrj says August 22, 2015

    Yes Agustin. There is a solution to every problem in the world. As I have mentioned in the article, Meditation is the best exercise one can use to overcome his fear, anger and every other negative emotions. Meditation would calm down your agitated mind and allow it to think before acting.

    I would sincerely suggest you to realise its benefits and start making efforts in that direction for at the end of the day, thinking about a problem alone cannot solve it. You must act till the end and endure with patience and perseverance. Stay positive and keep working upon it. It will take time but even the process is worth enjoying.

    All the best!

    Reply
Farz says March 27, 2016

Sir when I am become upset my legs will start shiverin

Reply
    asknrj says May 21, 2016

    Dear Farz, Remember one thing that our mind and our heart is very obedient if we learn to observe it and control it. We need to consciously tell them to stay calm and convince them that our emotions are temporary and life is long. We need to convince them that life is too short to worry or get upset over minor or even major issues. When we start looking at the larger picture we realise and then we will answer ourselves truthfully, that getting upset or worrying over every now and then is actually worth or not. When we stop giving them importance, the same would reflect in our own body language and we can improve slowly and steadily. It is a long process and demands patience. We should not breakdown midway. Success is near. It’s just that we need to empower ourselves a bit enough to be able to reach there and touch it.

    All the best!

    Reply
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